'Lovely to see you'

Lovely to See You

Yesterday I had the honour and privilege of leading the funeral service for a lady I once worked alongside. She was 89 years young when she passed away and can only be described as a character.

As people began gathering, I found myself greeting, smiling, and welcoming them. Many were familiar faces from the time we spent together at work. After the ceremony, I had the chance to speak with several of them, and I noticed myself saying the same phrase over and over:

“Lovely to see you.”

And I meant it. It truly was lovely to see them. But, of course, the circumstances weren’t lovely at all. We were there to celebrate the life of our dear friend and colleague, not for a happy reunion. That contrast got me thinking about the words and phrases we use—those little social scripts that roll off the tongue without much thought.

That simple phrase stayed with me, and it made me wonder: what do we really mean when we say things like “lovely to see you,” especially in moments touched by sadness?

Language is often imperfect, especially in the face of loss. We reach for the familiar, the comfortable, the words that help us bridge the gap between ourselves and others. And perhaps that is the point. At a funeral, we are reminded that life is fleeting, relationships are precious, and time together is never guaranteed. To say “lovely to see you” is not to deny the sorrow—it is to affirm the value of presence, of shared connection, even in the midst of grief.

So, off to Google I went. Unsurprisingly, the generic definition tells us that “lovely to see you” simply conveys the pleasure of meeting someone. Fair enough. I then looked for alternatives and was met with suggestions like:

• “Great to see you!”

• “What a nice surprise!”

• “I’m thrilled you’re here!”

• “Your presence brightens my day!”

• “I’m overjoyed you could make it!”

Now, while these might work at a party or over coffee, I think you’ll agree they don’t quite fit in the context of a funeral.

So, I’ve decided: I’ll keep saying “lovely to see you.” Because it is. Even in grief, even in loss, it is lovely to reconnect with people who shared a part of your life. The words may be simple, but the feeling behind them is sincere.

Sometimes, that’s all that matters.